Humor site The Onion has a funny spoof news article titled “NSA Wiretap Reveals Subject May Be Paying Too Much For Long-Distance.”
The director of the National Security Agency announced at a press conference Tuesday that the ongoing phone surveillance of Cincinnati resident Greg Wyckham has yielded “overwhelming and incontrovertible” evidence that the 37-year-old high-school teacher and married father of three is wasting money on a long-distance plan that does not suit his calling needs.
. . .
“We have stacks of logs showing phone calls placed on weekdays before 9 p.m., as well as calls made with flagrant disregard for the per-minute rate,” Alexander said. “In addition, not once did Mr. Wyckham ask his out-of-state friends and family members with the same long-distance carrier to join him in a money-saving service plan.”
Added Alexander: “Bear in mind that this is a man who earns only $43,220 a year. With both a Dodge minivan in desperate need of repair and the upcoming vasectomy to pay for, he should be more concerned about these expenses.”
NSA analyst Lawrence Reinhard, who headed the team conducting the wiretapping, said Wyckham has several cost-cutting plans to choose from.
I may not like the NSA spying, but it can make for some entertaining satire, I suppose.
[tags]NSA, Long distance, The Onion[/tags]